top of page

Romantic Enlightenment
Private Intensive for Couples:
Addendum:
Extra Agreements/Waiver

These agreements are an addendum for couples committed to a series of at least 30 prepaid sessions of Transformational iWaveTherapy with Katie Darling.

 

The agreements about the container on this page are additional to the "Original Session Agreements," which also need to be signed. 

Congratulations on your commitment to healing your relationship.  I know it's not easy to go through the feelings this brings up.

 

Now that we know each other somewhat, you hopefully have some faith in me and the work you have committed to:

 

30-SESSION PRIVATE INTENSIVE COUPLES CONTAINER:

 

It's all about the container. I don't work with couples without this container. Please know that although you will definitely experience radical shifts in this 30-session period, the sustained breakthrough and transformation you want may very well take more than one round. Also, please know that in my experience (40+ years doing this work with couples) it won't happen with less than this commitment.

 

Here are the extra agreements beyond and including the original session agreements linked above in the header button, which you may want to read first. (You will not be able to return to this page through the website, but only through the link I sent you.)

This prepaid 30-session commitment is a

  • no exit,

  • no leaving each other,

  • no threatening to leave each other, 

  • no ruminating about leaving each other :-), 

  • no refunds,

  • show-up-for-all-the-sessions

  • 30-session commitment.

  • is completed within 3 months

  • (in other words, re previous point,  it's not a "package," of 30 sessions, but a commitment to about 12 weeks of standing weekly and biweekly appointments, usually 2 individual sessions every week + 1 couple session every 2 weeks = 10 sessions/month — same no-cancel policy as described in general agreements for working with me. And I will do my best to be flexible on certain dates with plenty of notice, 48-hour minimum. If you glossed over that part of the general agreements please review!)

that’s quite a container right there!

We will agree about the frequency of individual and couples sessions, and set standing appointments which will be subject to the same (non) cancellation policy described in the original session agreements. 

  1. 100% Accountability and Commitment: This work of bringing a relationship back into an evolving, romantically enlightened love relationship is not easy. There are powerful subconscious and addictive processes in our consciousness when it comes to intimacy and partnership, and once certain patterns of relating have developed, it takes a powerful commitment and courage to break through to the next level. And an iron-clad container! Many people would rather hold on to their egos and pain-bodies than make this breakthrough.  For the real breakthrough you want, you must each make a 100% commitment, not just outwardly, but even deep inside yourself,  to this process and to me as your coach. 

  2. Fidelity and Focus: The container needs to be absolutely pure, and one of the “no exit” clauses is that this is the only work you are doing during these 30 sessions. Not other kinds of therapy, not plant medicine, or other journeys, not “trying out this and that.” Just. This. Work. (in terms of the type of work generally called “therapeutic”).  Definitely keep going to 12-Step meetings, psychiatrists and doctors, if applicable. If you are in mens’ groups or womens’ groups, whether formal or informal, you should not talk about your partner and your relationship there. Just explain that you're in a commitment to a sacred container to heal your relationship. This ability to stay in a container creates a kind of sobriety that can heal most relationships. 

  3. No Leakage:  In fact, you should stop talking about your partner altogether while you are in this process, (other than to extoll their virtues, and not at all if that doesn't feel natural), except to me in your private sessions, possibly in your couples’ sessions, and maybe to your own very private diary. The purpose of this CONTAINER is to actually put some pressure on you to change in a way that you would not normally change. Going  from  one thing  to another, or one person or group to another, or anything else you might do with substances to get relief from  the  emotions you may be feeling  is just going  to create a leak in the container, and the work literally will not work well with a leaky container. (As they say, “If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you've always gotten”). 

  4. When you get an assignment you must do it, with no excuses. Doesn't matter what your partner does. You are each 100% responsible for lifting this relationship to a higher level—no, it's not 50% each!

  5. Please read that last sentence about 100%, not 50%, responsibility again. It may come up later and I will remind you of this agreement (and this goes for all the above)!

  6. There may be new specific agreements which become clear to me as we go along. My only goal is that this work create an effective shift for you.

  7. In-Person Work: During a 30-session cycle I may invite the two of you to an in-person intensive at my home in Marin County. You can also request this! The word "intensive" hardly describes it -- a lot of progress happens. It's intense for me too!  The rate for this in-person work is 1.5x the Zoom rate, and how it generally works is we do 4 hours (with a break) and it's charged as 6 of your prepaid session hours.  

See you in sessions… I have a lot of respect both of your openness, spiritual maturity and willingness to commit to this process with me and I am honored to support you in getting what you want. Now reread this whole thing, and if you agree, in the letter AND the spirit of what is said here, click the button below, which will take you to a second email to send me. 

♾🌊❤️ 

Love, Katie 

    bottom of page